One result changes the outlook of a season.

What a difference a game makes. It truly is unheard of so late into a season for a team bottom of the league to win and then shoot out of the Premiership drop zone, but it’s happened again. How many times is that this season? This time it’s happened to my beloved Wolves after cracking in four against Blackpool. We’ve got ten games now to consolidate this position starting with Spurs next weekend, that’s going to be a tough one, but Blackpool beat them and we beat Blackpool so it suggests at least we might have the ability to get all three points, hell we did the double over fourth finishing Spurs last season and we’re a better team this term.  But still complacency or a draw could see us bottom again after the next round of games. Especially as the ridiculous results keep rolling in… West Ham 3-1 Liverpool, what the fuck is that all about? I think your crown might have slipped a little King Kenny, jeez! But they’re underneath us albeit on goal difference; let’s hope it stays that way. I don’t care if we stay up by the skin of our teeth on GD as long as we stay up. The thought of having to play in the Championship fills me with dread because, it’s not the Premiership and it’s so damn hard to get out of. Relegation would see seven or eight of our best players sold and we’d be back to the drawing board looking for basement league bargains again. It doesn’t bear thinking about… not yet anyway. Ten games and thirty points to play for and all of the big teams are out of the way. COME ON WOLVES!

Also I want to reiterate what has been said by many pundits, players and fans this weekend, RIP Dean Richards. He was a great servant to Wolves, playing more games for us than any other club in his professional career and against Spurs next weekend, another of his former clubs, there will be great love, sadness and respect shown to the player, I’m sure of it. An abiding memory I have of Dean Richards was seeing him at New Cross Hospital in Wolverhampton, at the time I was a young lad about seventeen years old and was under the hospital for continuous, unexplained clusters of mouth ulcers and swollen glands in my neck and throat I was getting about every six or seven weeks. I remember sitting in the waiting room waiting for my appointment and in came Dean Richards and Mike Stowell with, who I assumed at the time, an agent or club representative. Both of them were suffering with a similar cheek bone injuries if I remember correctly. A guy was there with his son, he was about seven or eight years old I’d say and he was awestruck pointing and saying something along the lines of “Daddy, it’s those Wolves players.” The boys’ father spoke to them and asked for autographs and they sat with the boy chatting to him for a short while and signing some bits of paper. I think in the end the club rep asked them to leave them alone (after a short interaction of course, I’m sure he was only doing his job) but clearly both players were more than happy to meet the public, something they didn’t really have to do. I dunno it’s a small, insignificant moment that means a little to me but probably not a lot to you. I was too shy and awestruck to speak to them myself. But it was a nice moment and Dean Richards spending a few moments with that kid meant the world to him, I’m sure he still remembers it fondly today.

I send my thoughts and best wishes to Dean Richards family and friends. You’re gonna be sadly missed, you’re memory and performances will live on forever.

RIP.

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The Arabic world is thirsty for freedom and democracy, no doubt about it.

So we’ve spent how many years saying Arabs are just idiots who let idiotic despots and crazy dictators rule them? About sixty or seventy. But now they have finally woken up to the fact that they have rights, not in their countries (as they are), but if they fight for them in their countries…. Good for them! Why stand back and watch idiots like Europeans and Americans drink lattes, have jobs, save money, watch movies and dance the funky chicken at a neighbours barbecue whilst you are told the power will be going off at six pm in your oil rich nation and the secret police will be raping you or maybe they’ll be passive tonight and simply beat you with a cane.

The expression of freedom in the Middle East is breathtaking; it’s unprecedented and is also fucking awesome. Why, oh why, why, why, should anyone oppressed, be made to feel like cunts in their own country – poor and without hope whilst an unelected and unaccountable dick-nose sits in a big palace washing his arse with a Golden rod fitted with a Mermaids hair flannel?

The revolution in Egypt has been astonishing and unpredictable (like most revolutions, who’d have thought aye?) The overthrow of Mubarak is like the overthrow of Saddam Hussein, minus the war and the unbelievable death toll. But it does leave a void. A power void that is being taken up by the military that helped win the coup. They’ve promised elections and freedom and all that jazz to David Cameron in Cairo… so it’ll definitely happen..! Egypt stands as the jewel in the crown of diplomatic relations for the west and they can change from that to enemy simply by allowing the military to maintain power. Will the people allow that? Who knows? As we’ve seen many times before military dictatorships are precarious. You only need to ask president Musharaf of Pakistan after 9-11 how safe they are. Egypt could now put two fingers up to the rest of the world and be a new Iran, taking attention away from a well established Iranian nut-case regime. A regime that could do with another coup. Give me an Iranian Green revolution any day! What happened to that guys? come on!

So far the revolution we have seen in Egypt and soon in Libya and the protests in Yemen, Tunisia and Bahrain has been in the name of democracy, freedom and dignity. Eventually these movements will become nationalised, they will want to be safe and maintain their economies, they will become about black gold. And why shouldn’t they? Has anyone considered the fact that the oil industries contracted and run by BP etc will face nationalisation to keep the wealth in the countries of these flourishing nations that’ll need the cash to offer its people the freedom, dignity and democracy they crave?

Revolution in the Middle East has rarely come where oil isn’t in existence. Look at Iran. Oil has been the corner stone of its revolutionary beliefs for years. Why else does the world care so much about Iran? Is it there movies, literature, or other cultural crap? No … it’s cus they can make black stuff flow from the ground that keeps my lights on, transports my goods, helps me go to work, delivers my pizza and flies me to Spain for a break each summer.

From Western points of view the Middle East aint about history, culture, religion or politics. It’s about oil and will the people taking over after revolution keep it flowing our way?

I hope so, but when a free Egypt and Libya nationalise oil we might have to pay more for it. But for fairness for all those oppressed people it is worth it. It truly is.

(As a PS to this post I’d like to say I feel sorry for the EMI oil company of Italy. They have operations in Libya, Tunisia Egypt and Yemen. I shall say no more.)

“Is the world more selfish, is it all about me?”

It seems that the world is getting ever so selfish, and I’m not excluded from this. I don’t want to pontificate about a world where all individuals think about is themselves without accepting that I am also as guilty as anyone else for being a bit selfish from time to time. We all are.

Selfishness is partly the reason that the human race has evolved to where we are today. Survival of the fittest is simply selfishness in action. Kill weak rivals and then take your pick of the healthy women, use intelligence to catch food, start a fire and build a shelter and let the less intelligent die as they sit out in all weathers sucking on a leaf as they look over their shoulders wondering from which direction the next sabre toothed tiger will emerge to eat a limb or two. But of course when you evolve to the level of self awareness that we have you would think that wanting to take care of each other would be a priority, no a fundamental part of being human. After all we all know pain and physical and mental pain hurts so no one wants to dish it out, because no one wants to receive it, right? Of course not, that is not the case. We see in humans, a species that kills one another without having the argument of self defence. We start wars, we argue, some of us even actively prey on others… man there is a selfish trait – psychopathic behaviour. Being so far head and shoulders above other people that they are actually low enough to be prey and sport. Nice! No other species does this. Eg, two spiders if they cross paths will warn each other off, then attack, but a spider never goes out at night with the sole purpose of ‘fucking up’ another spider. Only we do that. I can only assume some humans feel it is fun to do this, and they are so selfish the fun aspect overrides the fact that shooting, stabbing, punching or even simply mocking another human causes hurt and pain. ‘Why should I care that this sudden, hefty, upper-cut might cause you to fall and hurt yourself further? I like it.” But I suppose I digress a little here. I started talking about selfishness, not why are we violent.

We see a lot of selfish behaviour day to day, more innocent stuff but still annoying and dislikeable. At work I suppose it is acceptable to be selfish because being someone’s friend won’t get you a pay rise or a promotion. Letting your co-workers know too much about what you think or know or expect only gives them the edge in those private little one on one chats when it’s personal review time. I suppose this is the only acceptable time you can be selfish. But still you always run the risk of being found out if you knife someone in the back who thinks they are your friend and it comes out.  But we all have to do what we can to get more money or better prospects, and believe me this kind of shit goes on.  But its work and you shouldn’t take it too personal… business is business.

I sometimes wonder if selfishness is a reaction to an increased amount of atheism. I speak from the point of view of an atheist. I know people who think that as an atheist I must believe the idea that God isn’t looking at me judging me, ready to punish my sins, so I’m more likely to think ‘fuck you all’ and then look after myself. This isn’t the case because I try to treat others as they treat me; ‘be a mirror’ is my motto. I try to reflect how I’m treated. If you think I’m sharp, or ignorant, or nasty then it’s probably because that’s how I see you.  If I’m nice you’re nice. It’s a simple system. But having a healthy fear of death and lack of belief in an afterlife does mean I don’t wanna waste any opportunities and if there is a queue to get REM tickets and I have to push in to get one… I’m gonna do it folks. Plus Christians in the queue can forgive me this sin and then watch REM in heaven at some point in the future. I’m just not prepared to take that chance.

I also wonder if selfishness is a western thing. I mean in the 3rd world everyone has fuck all, what you gonna do, jump the queue to get your HIV results before Suki? Book the most expensive milk crate to sit on at your local eatery and nosh all the grain before Suki get’s back from the clinic? Punch Suzi in the face in a psychotic rage and enjoy it so much you murder her to get your hands on her Live Aid concert tickets? No you’re not. Having a simpler life where you toil the land, milk your goat, fuck your wife and then feed your dozen or so kids makes for simple aspirations. You don’t need to be selfish to get ahead or benefit from someone else ‘snoozing and losing.’ Everyone has the same and lives the same; no one is dying from obesity or pushing in front of you at Burger King. Sweet.

One thing that certainly has made people more selfish and to think “It’s all about me” is social networking sites like twitter and facebook. Now we all use them and most of us use them to stay in touch with a few people or to play games or find out about things we are interested in etc, etc. But some people have to have eight hundred friends, twenty comments on everything they post, then they post things like, ‘Going for a bath… just out of bath… towelling off my bollocks… sat in gown in slippers watching Eastenders like this if you like Eastenders” I suppose this isn’t so much selfish as self important but these idiots would go to pieces without the affirmation of strangers liking the video they’ve posted of their cat. (Don’t forget to subscribe to my blog, twitter and youtube though.)

I think I’m losing the thread of this argument and going off wildly in all directions. Selfish or self important? I suppose this blog post is about both topics now and what could be more self important than a blog where I moan about social networkers calling them selfish, self important cunts. Ha! Guess what I am folks?

I dunno what I expected to find out about my views on selfishness with this rant; it’s just a topic that has been on my mind for a while. A lot of what I’ve said is tongue in cheek and done for cheap laughs… (Is that tumble weed I see before me?) But I still wonder – why are we, as a species, getting more selfish and self important?  Is life just too damn easy and do we expect everything but want to do nothing to get it and therefore sulk and moan and whinge like Kevin the Teenager… when we’re not jumping a red light to get home because, ‘I need a piss and my takeaway is getting cold, I don’t care that I hit a pram on that pedestrian crossing!”

I dunno, food for thought though.

The Human Centipede (aka 2 girls 1 jap)

Time to share a movie review I wrote last November.

A while back I heard about a film coming out that was about a mad German scientists and his plans for a human centipede. I was intrigued at the title, “What on Earth could a Human centipede be?” I thought to myself. I did plenty of research on the film before I saw it and I knew pretty well what a human centipede was by then, people surgically joined ass to mouth… very nice.

The idea haunted me and sickened me for weeks when I first found out what it was, but now after I’ve seen the film I just see it as a very clever marketing tool. I mean in the film you see very little of anything. There are some disturbing moments like when the head human in the centipede takes a dump and the German scientists says something like “That’s it feed her” referring to the girl attached to his anus. But the scenes with the German police towards the end of the movie are stilted and very fake. Anyone acting like the German scientist does would get arrested pretty quick, but the cops instead decide to leave and return 20 minutes later with a warrant. What a lot of shit.

Overall it’s a pretty scary film because, despite its unlikely plot, it could happen. Yeah Freddy and Vorhees and Pinhead might be disgusting and make you jump but we all know they aint real. A mad surgeon with the funds and the means to do something like that means it could happen (the film is described as 100% medically accurate), that’s scary even though a little far fetched.

Overall it was a good film; I’d give it 8 out of 10 as a horror film if anyone cared.

Keep an eye on the news would be my advice for the psycho that tries to copy-cat this film. Someone, somewhere will think it’s a good idea. Someone somewhere times three will disagree.

Wolverhampton Wanderers 2-1 Manchester Utd

If someone had said to me before yesterdays game at Molineux that Wolves would walk away with all three points against the unbeatables that were Manchester United I would have said, “You’re fucking mental.” After the fine performance that Wolves put in to not only win but come back from 1-0 down and hang on to their lead for the 50 minutes of the second half; all I can do is state my pride to be a Wolves fan, yesterday I fell in love with the game again. For a few years now I’ve not been able to enjoy football which at one time was a huge part of my life. I can’t say what it was that made me feel like that before yesterday but I now reckon I was just sick of seeing Wolves as nearly men. Nearly good enough. Nearly winners. We’ve promised so much this season and delivered in the big games (Chelsea, Man City, Liverpool and now Man United), we’ve just gotta start delivering that same promise against the teams that are around us at the foot of the Premier league. If we can do that, and clearly we have the ability to, we should survive for another season of slogging out results and battling for survival. Next up the Gunners and against Arsenal, Wolves will have the wind behind them, the wind of confidence after such a huge result. But after Arsenal let a 4-0 lead at Newcastle slip into a 4-4 draw I can only expect that they will come out roaring to prove a point, or their heads will still be hanging low and they’ll let the mighty Wolves boss the show. Time will tell, they’re no mugs.  If we do beat Arsenal, and that isn’t such a ludicrous idea, we’ll have the set. The big five teams will have given us five big wins but I fear that Wolves could set a record as the first team to turn over so many of the big clubs and still get relegated. I hope I’m wrong about that and we stay up to do it all again next season – Up The Wolves!

Single mother jailed for first offense – not admitting stealing a £10 pair of jeans.

So a single mother of a three year old get’s jailed for a first offence of shoplifting a pair of £10 jeans in Londonderry, and no one is supposed to care? She denied committing the crime. Despite her claims of innocence she gets jailed and why….? Because she didn’t admit it. If she’d have admitted it she would have gotten away with a caution, but because she stood by her original claims that she wasn’t a thief she goes to do some porridge. My gut instinct when I heard this was, “Why would a single mother deny it knowing that a plea bargain would mean she was free to look after her kid?” Maybe she was innocent all along. This story is disgusting and is a tiny example of what is wrong with the justice system sometimes. Will she reoffend? Is she a risk to society by being allowed to walk free from court? This is one of the most ludicrous stories I’ve ever read or heard about; taking a mother from her kid in such a petty and pointless way makes me shake my head in disbelief. The world really is a mental place sometimes. I hope she wins her appeal, then sells her story, and then goes and buys herself a really expensive pair of designer jeans. The judge and jury in this case should feel ashamed they could hold their heads up in a court of law and pass such a verdict.

Read the story here